The Double Grumble

I am guilty.  James put his finger right upon the guilt in my soul.  He pointed it out and I saw it.  I wanted to look away.  But, I am guilty of a double grumble.

James said, “Don’t grumble about each other or you will be judged, and the judge is right outside the door” (James 5:9 CEV).  And then, with the Holy Spirit holding the flash light, James pointed at a shadowy place in my soul where the double grumble was hiding.  It growled.  It barked.  It snarled its teeth, not wanting to come into the light.

I said, “Lord, there it is.  I’m guilty.  I’ve been grumbling about grumblers.  I’ve been complaining about those who complain.  I’ve enjoyed pointing out their sin and immaturity.  And, in doing so, I’ve been guilty of the same.”

As if spanked on the hind-quarters, my sin heard my confession, and yelped fully into the light where I keep it chained, because I need to keep an eye on it.

Maybe you’ve noticed; that which gets us angry, that which gets our righteous condemnation, that which we whisper about to others, the sin we point out in others, is often present in us.

We respond to grumbling by grumbling.

We claim we are not cared for when we have not taken the pains to be active in the church community where, if we were full participants, we would have to care for others.

We gripe about those in power, in part, because we want to be those in power.  We’re jealous.

We gossip about the gossips.

We insinuate that so-and-so is stupid because we desperately want to be seen as smart.

When Jesus said, “Before you take the speck out of another’s eye, take the log out of your own eye”, he was on to something.  When I am guilty of that which I happily identify in another I enlarge the sin.  I double the grumble.

As Ash Wednesday and Lent approach I intend to keep my double grumble in the light where I can see him.  Examination of one’s life and soul in the holy light of God’s Spirit and the scriptures are emphases in Lent.  In fact, I’ll take special effort to notice what gets me angry, what stirs up my righteous indignation.  Chances are there is a double-something lurking in the shadows, chewing on my soul, needing to be brought into the light.